Hot Rods

January 9th, 2013

Joshua Zaback

Magic Market Archive

            Hello everyone, and welcome to another exciting edition of Magic Market, where we believe in bringing you the best new magic items each and every week, absolutely free. This week I’ve been thinking a great deal about rods. As a direct result, this week’s Magic Market is devoted to my favorite type of magical stick: the rod. Get ready for a bunch of roughly phallic-shaped objects with a wide variety of abilities to empower your characters and stock the wizard’s closet full of magical accessories.


Rod of Directions

Rod of Directions

            This thin rod of polished oak seems to have been made from a particularly large twig that has been magically strengthened and sanded to smoothness. A black leather ribbon has been wrapped about the wider base of the rod, allowing it to serve as a handy grip. Inexplicably, despite the apparently greater mass at one end, the rod seems to have perfect weight distribution and balances flat at the rod’s center.

            At will, the wielder of a rod of directions can set it upon any reasonably flat surface, such as the ground or the palm of a humanoid hand, and spin it counterclockwise. If he does, regardless of the amount of force he uses to spin it, the rod whirls exactly three times in place before coming to a complete stop pointing towards true north.  

            Additionally, the wielder of a rod of directions can attune the rod to a single object by touching it to that object for 1 minute. If he does, then up to three times per day, he may hold the rod out in front of him and begin spinning in a circle (a move action). After he makes three complete rotations, he comes to a stop with the rod pointing in the direction of the touched object. If the object is currently on a different plane, then this ability fails. The rod can only be attuned to one item in this way at any given time, and attuning the rod to a new object causes it to no longer be attuned to the previous object.


Rod of Lights

Rod of Lights

            This rod resembles nothing so much as an ordinary sun rod, though the iron and gold that it is made of were mined from a meteorite, or similarly astrologically significant structure. Apart from its finer materials, the only noticeable differences between a rod of lights and an ordinary sun rod are the buttons on either end of the rod of lights. The first button resembles a sun, stylized with a grinning face; the other resembles a star burst, stylized with a human face roaring with laughter, or perhaps terrible agony.

            A rod of lights can be used as an ordinary sun rod, though its illuminating effects last indefinitely, and striking the rod a second time causes it to cease glowing.  In addition to this handy utilitarian function, up to three times per day, as a standard action, the wielder of a rod of lights can press the sun button in order to greatly increase the illumination within 30 feet of the rod. The area within 30 feet of the rod is treated as bright light (regardless of the previous level of illumination) and dazzles all creatures within the area unless they succeed on a Fortitude save (DC 22). The bright light travels with the rod and remains for ten minutes, or until the rod’s wielder dismisses the effect (a move action), but creatures are only at risk of being dazzled on the round that the ability is activated. This ability cannot be activated in areas of magical darkness. 

            Finally, once per day, as a standard action, the wielder of a rod of lights can press the star burst button, which causes a sudden eruption of light equivalent to direct exposure to a super nova.  This creates an area of blinding white light that lasts for 1 round, and which dispels all magical darkness created by spells of 8th level or lower that are within sight of the rod. Additionally, creatures with a vulnerability to sunlight must succeed on a Fortitude saving throw (DC 22) or be affected as though they had been exposed to the sun for one minute, and continue to suffer any penalties caused by sunlight exposure for the next minute, as well. Even if the creature succeeds on its saving throw, it is affected as though it were exposed to sunlight for its next turn (for example, a vampire that failed its saving throw would be instantly destroyed, while one that succeeded would be staggered on its next turn. At the same time, a shadow demon that failed its saving throw would be unable to attack and could only take a single move or standard action each round for the next minute). Additionally, all creatures  able to see the rod, whether they are vulnerable to sunlight or not, must succeed on a Fortitude save (DC 22) or blinded for 1d4 days. Creatures normally immune to Fortitude saves are not immune to this ability. 


Rod of Noisome Destruction

Rod of Noisome Destruction

            This black iron rod is hollow, and is capped at one end, and cut with 10 finger-size notches, as well as a single larger notch which allows the rod to be used as a primitive flute.  Despite the crude appearance, music created by the crude flute is loud and rich with tonal quality, and the rod functions as a masterwork flute. Even when unattended, the rod seems to whistle merrily.

            In addition to its practical uses, a rod of noisome destruction can be used to amplify sounds, creating a deadly emanation of sonic energy. As a standard action, the wielder of a rod of noisome destruction can whip the rod about his head, gathering and amplifying the sound of rushing wind. He may point the rod in front of him, open end out, to unleash a 15-foot line of pure sound, dealing 1d6 points of sonic damage to all creatures caught in the line,  Additionally, those creatures must succeed on a DC 13 Fortitude save or be deafened for 1 round. 

            Once per day, the wielder of a rod of noisome destruction may attempt to play a deadly tune on the rod, requiring a DC 10 Perform (wind instruments) check. If he is successful, he creates a burst of deadly sound energy in a 10-foot radius centered on him, which deals 1d6 points of sonic damage to each other creature within the area, plus an additional 1d6 points of sonic damage for every 10 points by which he exceeds the Perform (wind instruments) DC.  Additionally, affected creatures must succeed on a DC 13 Fortitude save or be deafened for 1 round.